


Clever Costumes

by bluemadridista



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Halloween, Halloween Costumes, I'm back, M/M, Sort Of, Swearing, Use of the F-word so maybe it should be rated T, grumpy Marco
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-02
Updated: 2017-10-02
Packaged: 2019-01-07 22:16:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12241680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluemadridista/pseuds/bluemadridista
Summary: In which Mario's choice of costumes makes Marco rethink his choice to date him...





	Clever Costumes

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first football fic in ages! I thought I'd come back with one of my most requested OTPs. Hope you all enjoy it! Sorry it's been forever!
> 
> Reminder/Disclaimer: I own nothing, but the idea.

“It’s a stupid fucking idea.”

“It is not!” Mario whines.

“It is.” Marco is lazily insistent. His eyes are on his phone, scrolling through Tumblr and his latest obsession – puppy photos with fall themes.

It’s October. Everything is fall colors and Jack O’ Lanterns until November 1st when everything becomes fall colors and pumpkins.

“Marco! This is our first Halloween as a couple.”

“Mario, we’ve been together for six years,” Marco rebuts as he reblogs a photo of a yellow lab with a tiny orange and black witch’s hat perched on his adorable head.

“I _know_ that!” Mario is pacing around the living room in their shared flat. “But it’s the first time we can go out in public as a couple!”

“So, this is how you want to advertise our relationship to the public?”

“Couple’s Costumes, Marco! Everyone wears couple’s costumes when they’re together! It’s cute!”

“I won’t argue that some couple’s costumes are cute.” Marco shows off the image on his screen. Two Golden Retrievers in what could be couple’s costumes – one is a Jack O’ Lantern complete with a little hate with a pumpkin stem; the other, a witch with a witch’s hat.

Mario tries to scowl, but he cracks. Grinning, he says, “Send that to me. It’s so cute.”

Marco sends it to him after reblogging it from his own blog, resumes scrolling through his dash.

Mario resumes arguing his point. “Marco, come on! We have to wear matching costumes.”

“Mario, I have no real problem wearing matching costumes. But your chosen costumes are fucking stupid and I’m not wearing them. Think about it.”

“It’s CLEVER.”

“It’s not clever.”

“IT IS MARCO!”

“Perhaps I’m just too ignorant to see the cleverness of it. Please explain it to me.” Marco rolls his eyes and reblogs a kitten curled up inside a pumpkin bowl. Not a puppy, so how it’s in the “fall puppy” tag, he doesn’t know, but it’s too cute to resist.

“Marco.” Mario growls out his name.

That might be sexy, if Marco wasn’t so convinced that his boyfriend was a moron.

“My _name_ is Mario,” he says after a few moments.

Marco offers no response.

“Marco!”

“What?” Marco sets aside his phone finally. “Was that your explanation? Your evidence to support your idiotic case?”

“Obviously.”

“Your name is Mario. That’s it. Your name is Mario.”

“ _Ob_ viously.”

“Your name is Mario.”

Mario plants his hands on his hips and glares at Marco. There are no puppies to make him crack this time.

“Your name is Mario, which is why you want me to wear _that_. And you’ll wear _that_.” Mario nods after every “obvious” statement his boyfriend makes. “And that will make people see that, not only are you exceptionally _clever_ , we’re a couple.”

“OBVIOUSLY.”

“Mario!” Marco explodes off the couch. “You moron! Firstly, it is not _clever_ for me to dress up at Mario because _your_ name is Mario.” Mario starts to interject, defend himself, but Marco waves him off and steamrolls over him. “Secondly, it is not clever for you to dress like Luigi _because your name is Mario_.” Again, Mario attempts to interject. Marco karate chops the air between them. “BUT. THIRDLY. THE _MOST_ IMPORTANT THING THAT YOU HAVE FUCKED UP ABOUT THIS IDEA IS THE FACT THAT MARIO AND LUIGI ARE BROTHERS, YOU DOORKNOB!”

“Doorknob” is all Mario says in response.

“Don’t question my choice insult. Just acknowledge the fact that you’re an idiot.”

“Right after you acknowledge the fact that you’re mean.” Mario pouts.

“Mario, I told you it was a dumb idea when you texted me from the costume store. What did you expect me to do when you actually dragged the costumes home?”

Mario crosses his arms over his chest and pouts harder.

“Seriously, Mario… Tell me why it would be a good idea for two guys who like to have sex to dress up as Mario and Luigi for Halloween?”

Mario shifts a little, but basically keeps up the same pouty crossed-arms stance.

“Mario, you do know that they were brothers, right?”

“I thought they were friends!” Mario spouts.

“Mario, the video game was called Super Mario _Brothers_! Not Super Mario _Friends_. Certainly not Super Mario _Boy_ friends!”

“Oh, shut up, Marco! I didn’t think about that game. I just thought of Mario Kart and how we love it. And how my name is Mario and wouldn’t it be funny if I dressed as Luigi and you dressed as Mario.” Mario stomps his foot. “Damn it.”

“Well, it wouldn’t have been funny even if we weren’t dating.” Marco pats his arm. “Take them back. Buy something else.”

“No. I’ll return them, but I’m not buying new ones. We just won’t go to the party.”

“Okay.” Marco walks toward the kitchen. It’s nearing dinner time and his stomach is rumbling.

Mario stomps after him. “YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO ARGUE WITH ME!”

“I just called you stupid like five times. I thought the arguing was over.”

“NOT THAT. You’re supposed to argue with me that we need another costume and we have to go to the party because the whole team will be there and the national team and we can eat cookies and we can kiss in public!”

“We could stay home, eat candy, and have sex in private.”

“Don’t try to tempt me with sex, you siren!”

Marco narrows his eyes at him. “Mario, sirens…”

“I’M LEAVING!” Mario dramatically whirls away from Marco and stomps back to the living room. He snatches up the costumes and flails his way to the door of the flat. He makes enough noise to raise the dead, tempting Marco to call him back.

Marco doesn’t even offer him so much as a glance as he continues into the kitchen to prepare dinner.

 

When Mario slams the front door an hour later, Marco is back on the couch with a bowl of chicken curry that he ordered in after realizing he was too lazy to actually make dinner.

“Dinner’s on the counter. I got you a curry.”

“I FOUND THE BEST COSTUMES.”

Marco groans and hangs his head.

“THIS TIME IT REALLY IS CLEVER!”

Marco groans louder and stuffs his mouth full of chicken and rice. With any luck, he’ll choke to death and won’t have to hear the next words out of Mario’s mouth.

“I’LL BE A FOOT AND YOU CAN BE A BALL! THE BALL INFLATES!”

It takes all the self-control Marco has not to spit curry across the room. “Mario, if I look up from this curry and you are holding a foot costume and a ball costume, I will break up with you right now.”

Marco hears Mario’s footsteps retreating to the door.

“JUST KIDDING. I’LL BE RIGHT BACK. I, UH, FORGOT SOMETHING.”

The door slams and Marco stares down at his curry.

“I could be single,” he mutters. “I don’t really _need_ a boyfriend.”

The door opens a moment later. “Marco, are you sure it’s not funny?”

“If you don’t disappear, I never want to see you again. I’m going to embrace the SINGLE LIFE!”

The door slams again and Marco deflates with a sigh. What did he do to deserve falling in love with this idiot?

**Author's Note:**

> Please do leave kudos and comments if you enjoyed reading the fic! If you requested Gotzeus on my Tumblr, please leave a comment to let me know what you thought. :)
> 
> Again, sorry for being away for a thousand years! Life is weird, to say the least. It's good to be back.


End file.
